Tomorrow sees My Pretty Girl and I attending our first D/s public event. We are trying a fetish dinner party with a long established “orgainisation”. Some purchases of new gear have been made – Pretty Girl has lots of sexy outfits but surely one can never have too many heels and outfits? No? Hahahaha.
What generally has been lacking is what I can wear – so some goth / steam punk wear has been ordered. Pretty Girl seemed suitably pleased to see me in my goth /rock boots, PVC trousers and steam punk waitcoat. In addition, this little jaunt will serve as a useful exercise in trying out and establishing new public protocols. And of course we are rather hoping to meet a few new friends within this community. Friends from whom we can learn – I am quite sure we shall be the least experienced kinksters there. Maybe not. At least the event is specifically for D/s couples.
I hope Pretty Girl is ok – I know she is a little nervous, yet excited and up for it.
Somehow the excitement and anticipation of what lies ahead is titilating and allowing my rather electric imagination run riot.
The whole hotel is ours with a fully equipped dungeon there – just in case Pretty Girl is a naughty girl during the evening! She might want some extra dessert after dinner – who knows?
I shall report back following our evening of fun and naughtiness. She looks AMAZING in her outfits – had to try them on last night – and yes it ended up with a good spanking session.
Interesting read I happened upon – nothing ground breaking but presents at the end some interesting scientific research into what is effectively sub space and Dom space. As a Dom and Martial Artist and Zen student / teacher I found it fascinating that Dom enters “flow” which is a focus state of mind. Similar to that attained in martial arts.
Having read a blog recently from Missy (https://submissy.com/2017/01/17/vulerability/) by the same title I thought I should share my musings upon this subject.
As a Zen student and someone who has experience and interests in psychology and anthropology, I believe there are many people in life who are seekers, folks searching for understanding and a greater experience of existence. When we are born we are as pure as we shall ever be. Pure energy, pure love. This may be why we love small children and babies so much. They express themselves so purely. In time we learn we must have our own defences to protect ourselves from threats in this world – real or perceived! Life throws things at us, we are deeply hurt by people – most of all emotionally. So to reveal our hearts, take off all the layers and masks lays us bare and hence vulnerable. But for me the people we are closest to are surely people we should feel most at ease to open up to. This is why trust is so important in life and why it is one of the pillars of BDSM and frankly all good closely connected relationships. Continue reading Vulnerability
Just found this on a fellow bloggers site – brilliant. ( https://thrillofthechaste.net) Saved here for my own reference and just to share with all you kinky people!
So my Pretty Girl and I were having a downtime discussion last evening. She wore her lovely cute pink dress with frill socks and heels to please me and experiment with “little” attitudes. We are experimenting with dress to enhance the Dom and sub roles during conversations to engender the tender caring Dominant nature and submissiveness which avoids conflict. It worked a treat!.
Pretty Girl came to a few realisations herself which I had already understood but it was so lovely to see her work them out for herself – namely that the control really exists with the submissive in a way – as she chooses to give / surrender control.
Anyway – we ended up talking about a really common situation which must exist for so many couples – vanilla or D/s. We went to a masked ball recently and I bought her a new dress and heels. She absolutely loved them and felt proud to wear them. She said that she looked around the room and could not see a single dress or outfit she would rather be wearing. That made me feel proud that I had chosen well and she enjoyed wearing my choice.
A common scenario for many might be where a lady is indecisive about which dress to wear to dinner etc. Which outfit to choose? Go on girls, we all know some of you spend an hour or longer (how about all afternoon I hear some of you say!) trying them on again and again and again. You ask your man – which does he think you should wear?
Continue reading Keeping the Respect and Dynamic Alive – Errors Many Couple Make
So two days ago I hit a real low. My Pretty Girl and I are working through difficult times and trying to establish our own unique blend of D/s. Naturally I am a leader and a teacher and a guide and mentor – in many domains of my life. From ancient zen wisdom comes the expression “I shall teach you to the best of your ability”. Now I appreciate that has the potential to sound phenomenally arrogant – until we stop and think and realise that when it comes with love and humility it is really beautiful and makes a good teacher. We can easily drown someone by sharing knowledge which above their ability to assimilate – too big a step from their current level of understanding. One would not deliver a PhD lecture to an undergraduate! That would be egotistical and showing off potentially. Or at the very least failing to be a good teacher and understand that your job is to teach by taking them just one step further than where they are, with an occasional well judged leap.
Continue reading When It Feels Impossible!
Somehow the beautiful gift of submission and entrusting of herself (Pretty Girl) to my care has created the most powerful respect for another that I have ever known. It means that at times I am weak at the knees when I am with her. She is so beautiful and so kind and then to give herself to me so wholly – well. I could sing, cry, scream, collapse at your feet. I’d do anything for her. Walk the earth for her.
Now if that does not somehow mean the power has shifted I don’t know what does!! So what I am trying to say is that I would kneel and kiss her feet anytime – but she knows I enjoy to kiss her feet anyway ! But not out of her commanding me to do so – that does not work for me – more out of a willingness to be yours. Maybe that is what she feels the other way around as my sub. I want to please her. I want to protect her too though. If she wanted to tie me up and use me I’d let her – I trust her so much.
Thank you Pretty Girl.
Here are a couple of blogs I follow – they are husband and wife and living it for real. They have both been so helpful to me. Can’t recommend their writing enough. This is deeper than the Kink. This is what is really about.